I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Randomize
