Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Come on in and take your pants off
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