girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize