where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Randomize
