she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
