You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Randomize
