Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
