Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize