Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
My ATM looks so different sober.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
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