For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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