Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
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