Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
only you would photoshop your dick
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
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