I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
