Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
