He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
