It's like God shit irony all over that family
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Randomize
