don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
