Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize