a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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