Dual....:-)
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Randomize
