Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
