That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
