In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
