I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
love makes seman taste better
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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