Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
your like the ambassador to my penis.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
