We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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