Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
