five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
please come you make the beer taste better
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
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