I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
