I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Randomize