I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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