i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize