I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Randomize
