i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
My bed smells like the plague
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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