Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
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