those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
