Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
