i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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