How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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