"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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