I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
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