STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
