oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
