I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
We left an ass print on the piano.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Randomize
