My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
She even gives head with a lisp.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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