his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Randomize