Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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