That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
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