real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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