This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
