I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
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